Why asking for help is hard

Asking for help may sound simple. It isn’t always.

For a long time I didn’t know anything was wrong, so there was nothing to ask for. Then it clicked, and I knew I needed help. That didn’t make asking any easier.

Part of it is not wanting to be a burden. Everyone already has their own stuff. Why add mine?

Part of it is not knowing what to say. “I need help” feels too big, and “I’m fine” is so much easier to get out.

And part of it is that I’d already pushed people away. When I’m at my worst, I’m not easy to be around. It’s hard to ask people for something right after they’ve had to put up with me.

What I’ve learned is that the hardest part is the first sentence. It doesn’t have to be pretty. “I’m not doing great” is enough.

If you’re stuck on that sentence right now, you’re not weak and you’re not alone. Start with one person, or start by writing it here. You can write to me.

If it’s bad right now, this page is for you, and you can call or text 988 any time.

I’ll send the next one. You can leave whenever you want.